"if you’re straight then why did you say she was hot"
yo i’m straight not blind
One time a nun at my school saw a hot guy and said “woah God did a nice job on that one” and we all looked at her like ??? and she goes “I’m allowed to look at the menu I just can’t order”
I don’t mean to interrupt people I just randomly remember things and get really excited I’m sorry
i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
Stop setting yourself
on fire for someone who
stays to watch you burn.
what are snails even trying to do
When I find myself in times of trouble
britney spears comes to me
speaking words of wisdom